That’s why men who suffer from premature ejaculation are not able to foresee or regulate it. It happens suddenly although he had a slowly raising sexual excitement which didn’t promise early ejaculation. This is really depressing for men and may cause extra risk of unwanted pregnancy for women.
In these situations also is observed paradoxical reaction – the longer man is trying to hold back his ejaculation, the earlier it happens. Probably, the big wish to have this ejaculation conditions common emotional tension which adds up to tension connected with second phase of early and premature ejaculation, which in its turn only causes even faster acceleration of it.
In normal situations there is observed opposite, i. e., the stronger erection is in the beginning of intercourse (as sign of strong sexual excitement), the sooner ejaculation takes place.
The stimulating factors for early and premature ejaculation is nervous and rush atmosphere, also necessity for penis to be taken out from vagina in a rush if couple is practicing interrupted intercourse (which for men with unbalanced nervous system might bring even bigger excitement and accelerate ejaculation, which could be avoided if there wouldn’t be this fast movement), necessity to finish intercourse quickly because of the possible appearance of outer obstacles, as well as fear of being interrupted by other people.
For some men with neurotic premature ejaculation, depressing is also fact that even in their erotic dreams there are premature ejaculation taking place. Usually they interpret this fact as proof that their disorder is very serious. In the same time, this phenomenon is very physiologically normal, is observed for most part of the healthy men who have their nocturnal emissions before there have been sexual intercourse in their dream.
If men don’t have enough information about premature ejaculation, they might have a number of unpleasant feelings and unwanted forms of behavior which sometimes might condition dramatic consequences. It starts from the fact, that early and premature ejaculation is considered as a form of impotency, i.e., as insufficient potency instead of looking at it as super-potency, that is – as exceeding excitement what it actually is. So, man in this case, being afraid from impotency, is feeling tension and fear.
Sometimes he tries to test his potency by trying to repeat sexual intercourse too early, i.e. right after intercourse when he has not yet restored his normal sexual excitement. And when he is having problems in reaching second erection, he only proofs for himself that he is “impotent”. Also happens that sometimes a man, willing to “improve his shape”, refrain himself from sex for a long period of time, this way enlarging a period of sexual abstinence.
Sometimes also willing to test his potency, a man practices sexual intercourse each time with new partner, often in not so favorable conditions in which emotional tension, connected with it, brings to premature ejaculation.
Also happens that man considers himself a “sexually handicapped”, he avoids women, stops already existing connections, and becomes depressed, unsure in him and in possibility to settle his sexual life. Assurance in his own sexual incapability can be very strong if this man didn’t know anything about development of this disorder, which taking a form of increased sexual sensitiveness, doesn’t leave any doubts. This is also confirmed by a fact that in case of premature ejaculation, stopping of frictions for a little while can prolong sexual intercourse.
The same result can be reached by drawing attention off or taking sedatives. If premature ejaculation were a sign of insufficient sexual functions, then such an action (elimination of stimulants connected to frictions, decreasing of intensity of stimulants by drawing off attention as well as taking medications which decrease sexual excitement) would bring to decrease of sexual potency. But this is not what happens since, in this situation, oppositely are working “aphrodisiacs”, which increase sexual tension as well as any mechanical and mental stimulants which would increase it.
Some authors think that premature ejaculation is not as much conditioned by sexual excitement, lack of training and neurotic mechanisms, as by dysfunction of inter-ego connections and egocentrism expressed in sexual field.